Winter Faux Pas: the Wrongs and Rights of Cold Weather dressing

WINTER FAUX PAS: THE WRONGS AND RIGHTS OF COLD WEATHER DRESSING (PART I)

19/02/2016 09:00

W

hile I bang on a lot about the dreadful gear that seems to appear in the warmer months with the feeble defence of ‘keeping cool’ (socks with sandals, bumbags and cargo shorts, vests worn as outerwear…arrgh!) little attention is paid to some of the beastly wardrobe malfunctions that blight the winter months - with the contrary whine of ‘keeping warm’.

We don’t hold with any of that at Trouser Towers, we have stylish cuts, colours and combos for all seasons, so there’s no excuse!

Here are a few of my worstest winter wrongs, and some solutions for winning wintery rightness!

Sweater

Aran Jumper

Wrong! Ben Affleck sporting a grubby hoodie.

Right! The Aran Jumper.

Keeping your torso toasty!

WRONG! The ‘Sweatshirt’:

Even the name is horrible, redolent of locker-rooms and BO. While American ‘sporty’ dressing has no doubt softened the lines and increased the comfort of our clobber, there is no excuse for the brushed cotton sweat; baggy, unflattering and usually emblazoned with someone else’s name, brand or team.

RIGHT! The Aran jumper: 

Knitted in cables for perfect thermal insulation. Generations of Aran fishermen and Steve McQueen can’t be wrong.

Shorts

Peter Christian Trousers

Wrong! Who wears short shorts?

Right! Peter Christian Trousers.

Doing the Legwork. 

WRONG! Winter Shorts:

This awful habit was started by an Australian in Earl’s Court who had arrived in London (without realising the climate difference) and was swiftly copied by postmen countrywide, for reasons best known to themselves.

Some say it is healthy, I am not one of them. It can only engender chill, and makes a man look like a superannuated schoolboy with chapped knees!

As you all know, Peter Christian is huge in the Trouser Department

RIGHT! Trousers:

That’s why God invented trousers and handed them down to my forbears. As you all know, Peter Christian is huge in the Trouser Department, so before we start eulogising corduroy and moleskin, remember also our superfine wools and cavalry twills.

Youtube - Play Video

Peter Christian Nightshirt

Wrong! Tee-shirt and pants combo. Wayne's World (1992).

Right! The Peter Christian Nightshirt.

Best in bed!

WRONG! ‘Wearing an old tee-shirt and pants in bed’: 

Don't be a scuzzball! That faded old Motorhead tee-shirt and ball-hanger boxers are really not going to tempt nearest and dearest to roll over and keep you warm! And if she is wearing similar…trade in! Unless she is Tia Carreira of course…

RIGHT! The Nightshirt:

We have been manufacturing the famous Peter Christian nightshirt for over 3 decades. The winter-weight brushed cotton flannelette is the most comfortable thing you will ever wear in the sack…and no tangly bottoms or cords should your luck change! And if you go raw in the summer, our summer weight nightshirt might save you a little dignity up the wooden hill to Bedfordshire. (see also: Peter Christian pyjamas, dressing gowns)

Toodle-pip,

Lord T

 

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